Breaking Free From The Shadows

Sometimes I wish I could go back in time to when I was a younger. When life was simple, and filled with innocence. Back to when the colour of someone’s skin or how much money they made, or how their bodies looked was all irrelevant- because back in that period of life the people in it, were just people. Your hopes and dreams were all still realities and not one single thought was beyond reach. If you believed you were a super hero, then you were.

Then as you grow older, you become aware of everything adults say whether it’s right or wrong, you start to care what others think of you, you click in with the people you think are most like you and discard the rest and before you know it- there you are... filling up space on this big old planet consumed with stereotypes, judgement and your innocence now turned into ignorance.

At this stage we are just people who are on the inside desperately trying to figure out not just who we are, but where we belong in this world. We are too young to fully establish our own opinions but old enough to see the chaos the opinions of those above us have formed over time.

Identifying right from wrong at this stage is next to impossible, because all you’ve ever known is what you were taught. You aspire to be like mom or dad, grandma or grandpa, etc... So that’s what you do. You observe and trust that everything they do and say must be right otherwise why would they do it? It’s that tiny shed of innocence we still hold onto that leaves us blind to that very concept of trust.

Later in the game, you begin to see more, you are surrounded by people that at first sight, you would have never thought twice about talking to, you are able to form your own opinions based on facts you’ve learned instead of carrying the opinions of your parents or guardians... you are beginning to mould into who you are as an individual.  You finally begin to see that the people you once trusted turned out to be not so trust worthy. Then, that last shred of innocence you had is gone. It’s jaded.

So how do you go back? How do you un-see the things you’ve seen; How do you learn to stop questioning every belief you’ve ever had about life, people, love, money and success? And if you had that chance, would you go back? Innocence doesn’t need to remain ignorance and trust doesn’t always need to be concept based around lies and manipulation.

If I could go back, I’d do the same thing time after time. Every mistake, judgement and belief I’ve ever had made me who I am today. How? Because I did question everything I had ever learned, I challenged my beliefs, I questioned my loyalty... I had to.

Once you’re nearing the make or break point in your life, you’re left with two options; to continue being oblivious to what’s going on around you, or dive in head first and see life, relationships, and people for who and what they really are. Does their body shape really matter? Do their religious views or skin colour really get the final say in whether or not we chose to associate with them? Do their past mistakes need define them for the rest of their lives?

I’ve written about this time and time again about challenging who you are as person. It’s not something you do once and then poof, you’re a new person. It’s something you do over and over at various turning points in your life. As shifts happen and the world evolves- you need to as well.

To question who you are, your morals, your relationships... it’s not a negative thing. It’s reminder that not only keeps you in check but during that moment you regain that piece of innocence, you believe in those lost hopes and dreams because suddenly you’re reminded of not just the person you were, but you are able to see the person you are now. Every layer removed; your mind exposed... you see that true self reflection. And guess what- you won’t always like that person. I know I haven’t- but I also knew I didn’t need to stay that person.

The growth we make in life is of our own choosing and every shift we experience begins and ends with continually questioning not just yourself, but what life truly is and what it means to you. The values you hold up to, that make your life filled with unbiased opinions, fulfillment, laughter, and joy. Those are the values that define what makes us successful in life.

It is always a choice not to remain blinded by judgement. It is a choice, that at more than once point in your life you will be faced with. What you do in those moments will not just affect you. They affect this world and your mark on it. I challenge not only myself but anybody reading this to take a moment and question their life, and who they are... to reveal that truth and innocence most of us hope to find again. It may be jaded, but that doesn’t mean we can’t reshape it into something new.